I hate doing dishes. I hate it when the wash-up water splashes. Invariably, on to parts of me NOT covered by the apron. I hate it when the water gets into my gloves. I hate it when the nasty little bits of leftovers refuse to go down the drain. I hate it when a clean dish gets touched by a dirty one. I hate it when you find food stuck to a bowl which you spent ten minutes washing to perfection. I hate it when there is no space left to dry all the dishes you’ve washed.
Did I mention I hate wiping them dishes too?
That’s why I love dishwashers. Agreed, there is still a raging debate on whether rinsing dishes is necessary before loading. But my point is, even so, it’s a better option than doing the whole thing by hand. And as an econobonus, the new models do save water, plate for plate and cup for cup. It all becomes so much better with that wonderful magic potion – The Rinse Aid.
One day, my machine blinked, groaned and went to sleep. That week, I rubbed and scrubbed and wiped and stacked. The whole experience had to be made attractive. The brightest, prettiest apron. The best gloves in the business (aloe vera coated, no less). Hottest water ever for washing with the most lemony dishwasher I could find….mmmmmmmmm… the sensorial pleasures of hot water and steam with the smell of lemon (dishwashing heaven smells like this). I invested in new dish racks. And a gizmodic scrubber from paradise.
And finally, I pretended I was dishwashing – this was not real life – I was on stage. Acting out a scene. I sang. Loudly. Anything which popped into my head. Mostly it was a bengali song I heard my cousins sing in my childhood. No clue why. Once it was my school song and prayer. The gods must have liked that, for they answered my prayers with Mr Boon, the Handyman.
He came with his toolkit, and went to work.
“Can can, but machine very old. no spare par. I fix only like this. Can?”
The machine works now, but with some collateral damage. The water leaks out. But I, I don’t care for wet floors. I care for sparkly clean and dry dishes.
However, I have just one wish from the God of Small Everyday Things – can I have a dishwasher that can do woks? Dosai tavas? Dim Sum baskets? Asian cookware? Please, please?!